by Michael Mahoney www.healthyaudio.com
People often struggle to stay in control of their thoughts, feelings and actions, and may often use avoidance or alternatively be overly controlling in order to cope with life.
Staying ‘in control’ can be perceived to be positive or negative, depending on the circumstances of situations, the beliefs a person has about themselves and others, and the results certain actions may bring. Some people keep themselves too much ‘in control’ in a way which limits them from having a full range of life experiences. They may do this, as they believe it will keep them safe from imagined or potential harmful situations.
People who suffer from depression or anxiety use all their emotional energy to avoid situations and other people so that they can feel in control, which usually means that they are attempting to feel safe and secure, or are avoiding specific things that they perceive are fearful or harmful. They may also be attempting to protect others from themselves, if they have deep anger issues which they feel unable to control if someone triggers them.
Most people we speak to have some level of control issues to work through, especially around power and control within personal or work relationships. As a society, we are encouraged to be competitive and live our lives by conditions and expectations placed upon us, which may be difficult to adhere to, or are sometimes totally unnecessary.
We generally spend too much time in our heads, which overrides our intuition, and we can become confused about what it means to be ‘in control’. However, it is important to trust our inner guidance from the heart.
Did you know that the heart is the first organ that develops in a fetus, not the brain, and it also has neural pathways? It is 100 times electrically stronger, and 5,000 times magnetically stronger than the brain.
As we grow up we learn to ignore the messages from our heart, as we use the logical and analytic left side of our brain much more than the right side, which is the creative communicator of the heart. We all need balance of right and left brain hemispheres, to ensure that the communication between heart and mind is stable. We feel more in control when we are listening to our true selves, as the heart and mind are working as one.
We can then trust our feelings as well as our thoughts, and we can make clearer decisions about our reactions and actions. As we feel in control in a positive way, we can begin to understand things so much more clearly, and know what we want and the things that make us feel comfortable within ourselves. We can also become more nurturing of ourselves, and therefore our interactions with others are more compassionate and sincere. We no longer feel the need to regain control to feel safe, as we are happy as we are, without needing to avoid people or situations.
If you would like to learn more about staying ‘in control’ in a balanced way, and how to make positive changes in your life, then please contact either myself or my partner, Cate on 01925 658322 to arrange an Initial Consultation.
