Divorce is never easy. It comes with huge amounts of change, from where you live to how you manage your finances and much more. Read how to support your children through divorce.
If you’re splitting from your spouse and have children together, you may be worried about how it will affect them.
Take a look at our tips below for supporting your children during this tricky transition.
Have open, age-appropriate conversations
Children are naturally perceptive and will sense when something is wrong, so talk to them early about what’s happening in a way that’s appropriate for their age.
Younger children, for example, need simple explanations and reassurance that they are loved and will continue to be cared for. Teenagers, on the other hand, may require more detailed discussions and space to express their feelings.
When preparing for these conversations, create an environment where your kids feel safe to ask questions.
The focus should be on making your children feel heard, loved and reassured that both parents will continue to be there for them.
Prioritise stability and routine
Amidst the upheaval of divorce, creating a stable and consistent routine is key to helping your children cope. Routines can offer a sense of normality, which is especially important for younger children.
If your kids are splitting time between two homes, it may help to mirror routines between both households. Speak to your ex-partner about maintaining consistent mealtimes, bedtimes and school schedules.
This continuity can provide your kids with a much-needed sense of security during a period of significant change.
Support their emotions
Children can experience a wide range of emotional reactions, such as anger, guilt, confusion or anxiety. Young children might worry that they are to blame for the divorce, while older children might feel torn between loyalties.
Encourage open dialogue and allow your children to express their feelings without fear of judgement.
If your child displays signs of prolonged distress – such as withdrawing from social activities, changes in behaviour, or ongoing anxiety – it may be helpful to seek professional support.
For instance, a family therapist may provide strategies to help your children process their emotions healthily.
Consider a co-parenting plan
Effective co-parenting can be hugely beneficial to your children’s well-being. Maintaining a civil relationship with your ex-partner, if possible, will help your child adjust to your new family dynamic.
One way to achieve this is through creating a comprehensive parenting plan, which sets out arrangements for shared custody, holidays and other important aspects of your child’s care.
If you are struggling to reach an agreement with your ex-partner, it may be worth seeking advice from a family lawyer.
They may be able to help you navigate child arrangement orders, such as relocation, disagreements on schooling or taking trips overseas.
Getting expert help will make sure your kids’ needs remain at the forefront of any legal decisions.
By following these tips, you can help your children through the challenges of divorce, ensuring they feel safe and secure as they adjust to their new family structure.
